Mediation is where the big decisions get made — custody, schedule, holidays, expenses, communication. Most parents walk in overwhelmed and underprepared.
The ones who come in with clarity about what they want, what matters, and where they're willing to flex get better outcomes — for themselves and their kids.
Here's how to prepare. And a set of free tools to help you get there.
It's not court. Nobody wins or loses. A neutral third party helps you and your co-parent reach agreements on the things that matter — without a judge making the decisions for you.
Mediation is usually faster, cheaper, and less adversarial than litigation. Most importantly, it lets you and your co-parent stay in control of the outcome.
But it works best when both sides come in knowing what they need.
Mediation covers a lot of ground in a short time. The more clarity you have going in, the better the outcome. Here's what to prepare:
Your schedule. What custody pattern works for your life and your kids? How will you handle holidays, summer, and school breaks? What time do exchanges happen? Where? What happens when someone needs to swap?
Your finances. What's a fair expense split based on your incomes? What counts as shared vs. individual? What does child support look like in your state? Who carries health insurance? How will you handle unexpected costs?
Your values. What are your non-negotiables as a parent? Where are you willing to compromise? What do you think your co-parent's priorities are — and where might you actually agree?
Your communication. How will you communicate day-to-day after mediation? What tools or systems will you use? What happens when you disagree? How much response time is reasonable?
You don't need perfect answers. You need a starting point — something to react to, refine, and negotiate from.
We built these specifically to help parents walk into mediation organized.
Walk through schedule, holidays, summer, expenses, and exchange logistics step by step. Get a shareable summary you can bring to mediation as your starting point.
Build Your PlanThe Co-Parenting Alignment Plan helps you identify your priorities, your non-negotiables, and your vision for raising your kids — before you start negotiating.
Create Your PlanGet a rough estimate based on your state, income, and custody arrangement. Walk in with a number in mind, not a guess.
Support CalculatorSee how you show up when conversations get hard. Useful before mediation — and after.
Take the QuizBring your preparation. Print out or have your custody plan, alignment plan, and support estimate accessible. Having something concrete to reference keeps the conversation grounded.
Know your non-negotiables — but keep them short. If everything is a non-negotiable, nothing is. Pick the two or three things that truly matter and be prepared to flex on the rest.
Listen more than you talk. You'll learn more about where your co-parent actually stands if you let them explain their position first.
Stay focused on the kids. When the conversation drifts into the marriage, the mediator will redirect. But you can help by framing everything around what your kids need.
It's okay to take a break. If emotions are running high, ask for five minutes. A calm decision is better than a fast one.
The agreement you reach in mediation is the starting point. The real test is what happens next — the daily coordination, the swap requests, the expense splits, the conversations about the kids.
That's where most agreements break down. Not because the plan was bad, but because there's no system to support it.
Clearly takes what you agreed to in mediation and gives it a daily operating system. Your custody schedule, expenses, shared info, and communication — all in one place, all structured to keep things moving forward.
Every message passes through Clearly. The emotion stays out. The substance comes through. So the agreements you made actually hold.
It's currently in early access for iOS.
Need help with communication?
Take the Communication Style Quiz