What does child support cover vs shared expenses?

Child support covers basic daily needs: food, shelter, clothing, and basic utilities. Shared expenses are the extras that come up throughout the year: medical copays, prescriptions, sports fees, music lessons, school supplies, field trips, tutoring, summer camps, and unexpected costs like a new bike or emergency room visit.

How should co-parents split shared expenses?

Most co-parents split shared expenses either 50/50 or proportionally based on income. Income-based splits often feel more fair when there's a significant income disparity. The key is agreeing on the method upfront, defining what counts as a shared expense, setting a threshold for advance approval, and establishing a reimbursement timeline.

Why do co-parents fight about money?

Money fights usually aren't about the money itself. They're about control, fairness, and old relationship patterns playing out in a new context. When there's no clear system, every expense becomes a negotiation — and every negotiation carries the weight of the entire relationship history.

How do I set up an expense-sharing system with my co-parent?

Define what counts as a shared expense, choose a split method (50/50 or income-based), set a dollar threshold requiring advance approval, agree on documentation requirements, establish a reimbursement timeline, and consider using a shared expense tracking tool or app. Put it all in writing as part of your parenting agreement.

How to Split Expenses With Your Co-Parent

Why money becomes a fight.

It's rarely about the amount. It's about the pattern.

One parent pays for something. Sends a text asking for the other half. The other parent questions whether it was necessary. Now you're arguing about soccer cleats — except you're not really arguing about soccer cleats. You're arguing about fairness, control, and everything that came before.

Without a shared system, every expense is a negotiation. Every Venmo request is an opportunity for conflict. Every receipt is a potential argument.

It doesn't have to be this way.

What child support covers (and what it doesn't).

This varies by state, but the general rule:

Child support covers: Housing, food, clothing, basic transportation, basic personal care — the day-to-day cost of keeping a child fed, sheltered, and clothed.

Shared expenses (usually split separately): Medical co-pays and uncovered healthcare, dental and orthodontics, extracurricular activities and sports fees, school supplies and tuition, childcare and after-school care, travel for activities, electronics, summer camps.

These "extras" add up fast. And the divorce decree may or may not specify how they're handled. That's why you need a system.

How to set up a system that works.

Agree on your split up front. 50/50, 60/40, income-proportional — whatever works for your situation. Get it documented so it's not renegotiated every time.

Define what's shared. Create clear categories: medical, education, activities, childcare. Agree on what falls inside the shared bucket and what doesn't.

Set a pre-approval threshold. Anything over a certain amount (say $100 or $250) requires both parents to agree before it's spent. This prevents surprises and resentment.

Track everything in one place. Not texts. Not Venmo descriptions. Not a shared Google Sheet. One system where both parents can see what's been logged, what's owed, and what's settled.

Settle on a schedule. Monthly is usually easiest. Regular, predictable, less emotional than settling up after every individual expense.

Estimate your child support.

Our free calculator helps you see what support might look like based on your state, income, and custody arrangement. It's a starting point for conversations — not legal advice.

2 minutes · Free

Support Calculator

This is for you if:

You're newly separated and haven't figured out how to handle shared costs yet
You have a system but it's not working — too many texts, too many arguments
You're preparing for mediation and need to propose an expense split
You just want a clear, fair way to handle money without it turning into a fight

When expenses are handled, everything else gets easier.

Money is consistently one of the top sources of co-parenting conflict. When you have a clear system — agreed-upon splits, transparent tracking, regular settlement — you remove the friction. And you free up energy for the decisions that actually matter.

How Clearly handles expenses.

Log shared costs and Clearly pre-calculates each parent's share based on your agreed split. No spreadsheets. No awkward texts. No back-and-forth about who owes what.

Every expense is documented, timestamped, and exportable. Clean PDF and CSV reports with business record certification — court-ready if you ever need it.

It's currently in early access for iOS.

Learn more about Clearly

Figuring out money with your co-parent.